You might be in a bush taxi if...

...your door is tied shut with an old seatbelt

 

...someone's child just peed on your lap

 

...actually, peeing yourself sounds like a good idea

 

...a snot rocket (courtesy of the driver) just hit your cheek

 

...a chicken keeps eating bugs off of your arm which is jammed between your body and the only fat woman in     Niger

 

...when the driver decides to pass trucks you begin making promises to God, even ones you can't keep

 

...you notice that the mile (or kilometer) markers, oddly enough, are shaped just like tombstones

 

...you decide that walking 20k uphill, against the wind, through deep sand in 100 degree weather was a better     idea

 

...you're praying for unconsciousness

 

...the fumes from the gasoline in the backseat being illegally transported have rendered you unconscious